How to Get Closer to Your Mate
Connecting Through Physical Activity
By Alana Newton
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Last, but certainly not least, is the importance of bonding through physical activity. Whether you are striving to achieve a goal like completing a marathon, or simply weaving in small physical activities into your daily lives, do something physical together. By connecting physically, you and your mate are ultimately strengthening an emotional bond, while also getting fit and healthy.
“Since both of us lead stressful professional lives, my husband and I Iike to share our time together by walking our Australian Shepherd, Pepper,” says Sarah, of Los Angeles. “We enjoy being outdoors with Pepper whether it is at the dog park, on a hike, or just playing fetch in the backyard. Since she is our only ‘child,’ we both take great care in seeing that she is happy and healthy.”
Don’t have a pet? You and your mate can still bond with outdoor activity by simply taking a walk around the neighborhood. If you can’t seem to make time for it or always find an excuse not to go, try penciling it into your calendar like an appointment. You wouldn’t cancel on a client or friend, so make it a point not to cancel on your mate. Scheduling a nightly or weekly walk around the neighborhood, with or without a pet, will allow for the two of you to have extra talking time as well, which will allow you to bond intellectually, as well as getting in some much needed exercise.
Below are some other suggestions for ways to connect through physical activity:
1. Sign Up for a Gym Membership Together- Perhaps you need that extra push to exercise together- and you won’t want to let that monthly fee go to waste. If the gym has indoor tennis courts or a pool, have fun with it and play a little! If it’s more of a simple gym, try going on adjacent treadmills or even try a unisex class together like kick boxing. If your mate happens to be more physically fit than you are, ask him or her for pointers on how to strengthen your weak areas. Allowing your mate to teach you is a true form of bonding, as you are applying the important task of listening as he/she feels useful and needed. Want to take it a step further? Try training for a marathon together. You will ultimately get the satisfaction of completing a goal.
2. HUG- You have two arms, so give your mate a hug every day. Physical connection can be felt in such a simple act and you will be sure to feel closer in mind, body, and spirit. (It’s also pretty hard to be made at someone while they are trying to embrace you).
3. Have Sex-The no-brainer under physical activities, sex is a must with any and all forms of bonding! Your new sense of confidence from going to the gym together will be all the more beneficial when it comes time to taking off your clothes.
4. Pick Up a New Physical Hobby that is New to Both of You-Feel like you would fall flat on your face if you tried on a pair of ice skates? Good. Let go of all your inhibitions. Life is too short if you are too afraid to try something you might fail at. The bond you will experience when you and your mate try something new, like ice skating, skiing, surfing, snow boarding, or even parasailing, might bring out the silliness in you- which, in all seriousness, is perfect for strengthening your relationship.
5. LAUGH- Don’t forget about life’s feel good moments. When was the last time you and your mate were laughing until your stomachs hurt and tears were rolling down your faces? Sometimes we focus so much on who is wrong and who’s right, how to win a fight, and how to get our way that we take ourselves too seriously and don’t enjoy the moment.
If only we could all make a conscious effort to “let go,” we might find that bonding through spiritual, intellectual and physical activities takes less effort than we think.
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